Being independent for almost three years has taught me some life lessons in being independent. I have done some things in that time I haven’t been proud of and there’s things I’ve not succeeded at. However, it is a learning curve and within time it gets better. There’s this great thing called boundaries that you have to develop that can be a challenge. Once you learn the power of it and knowing when to stand your ground, it is a wonderful thing.
The point is and I know better is that medication does wonders for me. I should have known this, but I learned the hard way and now there is only room to grow. Being independent can open your horizons to so many possibilities that you may not even know to handle. Yes, it can get lonely but you have to curb when to let others in and out of your life so that you can manage your autistic effects as you need to.
Boundaries are also things you choose to do that others that are close to you may not necessarily agree with. They can support you in your journey, but they also must give you room to grow. I have learned my lessons and continue to do this day. There are days I don’t have the inertia to adult, but I do because it is one of the necessary evils of being independent. These can be things like developing your own belief system or choosing whether or not to wash your hands at certain intervals throughout the day. Your One belief that has been tested within the past year has been whether or not mask wearing is essential when being around others.
Also, as an autistic person’s food palate may be limited, one as they may want to expand it if the opportunity presents itself. They will have to learn of course if they do indeed like it, but it is something that they may not have had the opportunity to do in their home because the chance may not have presented itself. Another thing that is rough to hear is that an autistic person may choose to be someone else that may not be the norm of society because they feel tat the world is limitless and that they can now be their true selves. If the opportunity presents itself, by all means it should be encouraged. If it isn’t harming you, then why is it a big deal? As the supporters if autistic persons, you need to let the individuals learn and grow into the person who they want to be.
As an autistic person who grows up in an average family, because of having complex challenges as autistics do, it can be hard for autistics to have the ability to be themselves in a place where they may experience fear in doing so. The caregiver’s role is simple in this regard. Allow then to do so, be safe and educate them on all the choices they make. If they chose to do something that you may feel that is too risky, educate them on the dangers and provide them a safe place to express their feelings and individuality. Autistic people have already been scarred enough by what they have been handed in life. To take away the way that they truly want to be in life can be hurtful and challenging.
You as the caregiver need to give them space to learn, grown and be safe. Autistic people are smarter than you may consider them to be. This isn’t just a season of the month and it doesn’t end with a time. It may be what they have been feeling for some time and by you giving them the opportunity to be their true self, it is helping their self-esteem and making them grow into a more well-rounded person by letting them grow into who they truly want to be.
I as an autistic understand that caring for an autistic individual can become a challenge, but some of the behaviors that one may exhibit may be because they are not given the space to grow into the person they want to be. Let them grow, please. You may be blown away at the person that they can become if you allow them to grow into the person they want to be. They will let you know eventually that they got this and that they will slowly wean off from needing guidance because those that care for autistics wont be around forever.