As an autistic person, our brains can constantly be in overdrive. It can be constantly brewing thoughts that can sometimes be negative and if they are allowed to spiral and obsess out of control. Having a healthy balance of when to entertain and rest your mind is key in living independently as an autistic person.
Whether we like to hear things or not, it can sometimes be a struggle to accept them for what they are. Having to follow through with things because it is necessary for us to be there or be our best selves can sometimes be hard to see if you don’t feel it, but you must know it's right.
Recently, I have realized and accepted that much of my moments regarding increased anxiety and anger result from struggling with the fact that I need to prepare myself to transition to something outside of a safe space to something that has the potential to be unpredictable or where I have no control. I have also understood that this is what comes with being autistic.
As I started the new year, I mutually made the decision to discharge from a mental health service that felt that I am at a point of wellness that it has become more of a struggle to find issues to address.. It is accepting that I am improving my mental health journey and am ready to move towards bigger and better.
When you enter life on your own, having freedom can either be good for you or bite you in the tail. Over the past four years, it spun me into rock bottom and I had to pick up the pieces. It also made me realize that I had to define who I was and how to take care of myself.
Most of my life as a neurodivergent person, the holidays have been a struggle for me to muddle my way through because of all the factors that it involves. Yet, as I am finally settled in a better place in my mind, I am realizing that I need to define my own or new traditions.
We’ve talked some on radical acceptance in both the Adulting and Reflections columns of my blog, but what I had to understand recently is the fact that radical acceptance is what is needed in order to endure what I need to do in order to be well.
One of the common misconceptions of being autistic is the fact that we don’t show empathy or know how to be kind to others. Oftentimes this is brought to light in the first time that you get to know us, because if you knew who I am, I am quite the empath and can show empathy.
One of the traits of being autistic is the fact that we see things in “black and white” and hardly any “gray” areas of a situation. For the longest time, I struggled with the fact that things have to be exactly as they need to be or they can’t be right.
I’ve taken some time to come to terms with writing this article in a genuine nature to feel truly thankful in my life for the blessings that I have in my life and to be grateful for them.
Because of several changes to my schedule over the years, many times my anxiety can play into me being unhappy with my life. It can sometimes run over into other feelings like anger, but most of all, these feelings have become redundant and never seem to end, so it makes me wonder if I will just be happy for once?
Recently, I have been greatly complimented about the progress I have made over the past few years. It can be hard to acknowledge the compliments that I am given, especially if they come from those that it takes a great deal for them to acknowledge my success.
Recently, I have realized how much more accepting I have came at embracing my autism for what it is and recognizing the need of having accommodations to better manage myself in situations that may be challenging for me that I would otherwise have struggles in getting through.
As I commonly say to not only myself as a pep talk but to others with similar diagnosis, “sometimes things happen” I for one, catastrophize the worst possible scenario, but it is critical for us to keep our calm in those situations so those who need to orchestrate what needs to happen to solve the problem can happen safely.
Sometimes, I ask myself, why do I keep on going? Why do I never give up? I often make statements about not doing things in my life because of how I feel at that moment about them, yet I continue to do things because I know that they are the right thing to do.
As we are nearing the third year of the pandemic, I am beginning to understand the need to let my fears diminish and find wellness via my own dimensions, whatever that may be. As always, getting out of the door can be the hardest part of doing something that is uncomfortable for me and many other autistic individuals, but once we know we are OK, we excel at what we are doing.
As I concluded in this week’s Reflections post, autistics across the spectrum are enduring things that seem like we are at times reversing the clock from where we have come back to the way things were. I used to be in what was the dark ages and have been through so much prior to and… Continue reading The Great Regression
One of the traits of being autistic for one to adhere to rules, orders, etc. For me in my over four years of independence, it has been a contentious point to not understand standard norms, however, I am realizing the necessity of doing what is necessary because they are meant for a reason.
Last week, I had the opportunity to reflect on the last 2-3 years and how much of a roller coaster it has been, yet there have been several blessings that have saved me into being in the better spot that I am today.
One of the biggest challenges I have experienced in my life that I am still overcoming is my anxiety. It is a common comorbidity with autism and as such can produce many challenges in the daily lives of the autistic person, and as such I am no casualty in this regard.