Over the past few weeks when being out and about, I have had to learn that regardless what someone has cause me or what I personally feel about them, I mustn’t treat them differently because of that, I have to remember that they are just a person as much as I am and it doesn’t cost anything for me to be nice to them.
Yes, it is likely that in the circles that I am in that everyone experiences challenges in their lives the same as I do, They could likely be going through more challenging situations than I am. Therefore they shouldn’t feel like there is any hatred because they present more challenging behaviors than I do. Just because something causes conflict between them and me doesn’t mean that I have to continually hold a grudge because they acted the way they did.
There are indeed those live and learn moments where after you lived and learned what you went through that you must do whatever is necessary to protect yourself from causing further harm to yourself. Because they experience more challenges than you do in the situation doesn’t mean that you have to push yourself away completely, especially if you have to continue to be within the same confines as them.
You must however establish that boundary and no matter how much you get pressured to let it down, you mustn’t. It must be remembered the pain and anguish that was caused by opening up yourself to someone and making you vulnerable to them. It may also help you understand the consequences of being vulnerable without being mindful of the whole picture and what can happen if you are not careful and let your guard down.
Many autistics can be naive and vulnerable to those that seek our attention, It can cause damage beyond repair to ourselves. Luckily for me when I faced such an action, I was able to nip it in the bud, therefore I have learned more from my actions and as a result keep my guard up more and have built more boundaries and protected my naivety and vulnerability traits from being opened to exploitation. I have understood that not everyone in the world thinks alike and that I must first and foremost protect myself from overall damaging behavior.
Regardless, whether or not you agree with the way someone treats you, you must be the kinder one in the situation and remember that being nice is the best course of action you can perform rather than act a negative perception of yourself and give the opposing party evidence that you indeed cannot move on from the situation at hand.
Regardless of whether or not you have had challenges with someone, you have to do what is best to avoid whatever challenge that causes further damaging behavior to you. You must make your mental health a priority in your daily living and whether or not someone else is kind or not to you in return,the ball is totally within their court to improve on how they react to the situation at hand, however, you must continue to hold your head up no matter how challenging it may be to do so and remember that you are indeed responsible for your actions and being nice pays off in dividends to the people who truly care and want to be with you.
As Selena Gomez Sings:…Kill em’ with Kindness!!!