I have mentioned over the last few weeks that I have been journaling my foods that I have been consuming. As such, I have been realizing all the damage and suffering I have been causing to my body by consuming such foods. Autistics are known to have issues with their Gastrointestinal System and I am not immune to this deficiency. Therefore, I have realized that I need to be more on top of the things I consume instead of ignoring the need to take care of myself.
Sometimes, I sleep past the desired hour. I would like to have breakfast. I have that activity that I would like to do or that meeting to attend and breakfast gets pushed by the wayside. I know that breakfast is the most important meal of the day and that I need to eat something. However, on a day like yesterday when I didn’t get up until 9:00 AM and rushed for a 10:00 AM meeting that was scheduled to last 90 minutes I knew that by the end of it I would be parched and needing some food. I am blessed to have food that I can access and knowing that it was closer to the lunch hour, I had 5 wings. It wasn’t a whole lot, but it was enough to make me satisfied for what I ate. I planned and had pasta and sauce later in the day, which was also filling and I saved enough for today to have when I get home from programming.
I know I need to plan more. It helps me be better and not make sudden decisions of things that aren’t beneficial to my health or are hard on my body. I have been back on my own for over a year now and know how and why things work and the punishment if I have foods that hurt my health or body. I do some things I know to help in that arena. I assist in planning with the meals at the day program when I can and assisting in the publishing of the monthly menu so I know I can look and see what is being served on the days I attend. I try to control, in my eyes, what I am eating and know when I will be able to make those special trips to get something special. I know I am not at a point where I want to be as we end 2021 but I am better than I was in March of this year and fear that if I don’t become responsible and do something like go back to weight loss support group in the spring, what my body will become. Would I be 400 pounds? Would I be unable to climb the 22 steps into my home? But the better part of that is that I am ahead and while it isn’t where I want to be at the moment, it is better in some regard. I admit, I have been lazy when it comes to expending energy and I haven’t been truly to the point that I need to be. But, I know I am making progress.
The food journal is one of those things that helps me in this area. As a requirement for the weight loss support group, I am accountable to that journal I keep to record my personal weight and when I medicate daily along with the food I eat and the beverages I consume. Someone once said that you need to account for every BLT, Bite, Lick and Taste. I have found it so helpful and I have been on it most of the time, but actually writing it down makes me feel as if I have something, even if it is a journal, it matters. It makes me responsible to review what I did put in my mouth in the course of the day. Did I take my medications? Where am I at with my weight? In my life, all of these factors are very important in order to know just what I need to do. Can I live a little more? Can I be more stringent? What do I want to eat today? For many autistics who like to calculate every move, these are important factors in knowing if you are well or not.
I know as a man that is way too big and needs to get serious about losing weight sooner than later, the ball is in my court and I have to be the one to be taken. One of those responsible things I did this spring was go back to my weekly weight loss support group. Going there routinely makes me obligated to be accountable to their scale and work on progress, although I have fluctuated later this year. Another facet of accountability is to ensure that I am journaling my intake and I am proud that I have been this consistent, although I haven’t been attending in the past three weeks. I fear that if I didn’t, my weight would have skyrocketed back to near where it started when instead it has decreased greatly. I have also taken on some additional responsibilities as I can to help out, which is a big step for me.
If you are struggling with weight issues right now, please know that you are not alone. Find something, no matter how small it is that works for you and go with it. For me, getting back on track was realizing that the number on the scale was the highest in my life to go back to meetings and to get real means I have to do what is recommended and known to work. Hopefully, everything will be better next week, we can only hope for the best.