As an autistic person, life can offer challenges. It’s often difficult to move on from things that no longer serve you. Being led to believe that certain things should be a certain way has been a struggle. In reality, it was quite the opposite, and this has been a continuous battle for some time. Some moments can still be difficult to move past, even when I know they can never come back. Part of my brain wants to feel and believe towards others because of how stressful these moments were to me.

Ultimately, I know that it is not my fault for what happened and the way that my brain has thought. It hurts me to know it should have never happened. At times, it has flawed things as they are now. This makes it harder to let go of the past. Moving on to the current is a part of living in the here and now. There is a part of me that wants to hold on to the past in my own time. It hurt me and made me unhealthy. While the process continues to wane, there are times when I feel down. I find myself out of sorts because of the way it makes me feel and act. There is time for so much better.

In the outside world, I do my best to move on. I try to see past the things that hurt me before. Those past experiences caused me stress. I now know that I need to set boundaries based on past experiences. It is up to me to keep and respect them. This will guarantee I do not fall into the same recourse as before. It can be hard and hurtful, but as long as I do what is needed, then there is no issue.

Things are different now. Many things in the past did not happen as they should have. I must be willing to understand and accept the reality of the current situation. The daily operations of something struggled for a long time. They were not as good as they should have been. I have started to improve from the issues I have had over several years.

Other things can improve too. They do not have to be blown out as they once were. I must be willing to accept the changes. I need to understand that things, while different, are not the fault of the past. They are indeed different now. In the end, they are better than what they were and can do what is intended much better than before.

All of these things give the drive and motivation I need. They help me make things better and move away from my old ways of thinking. I had filled my brain with too much for so long. It became repetitive and consuming. I am starting to let it go. I am realizing that I need to release the old things. They are no longer part of what I must go through. I need to move on by letting go of the things that make no sense anymore.