One of the worst things that I have struggled with repeatedly over the years that I have struggled with understanding my medications for particularly my bipolar disorder is that there is initially a drowsiness in the ability to be able to stay motivated especially under times of which I am free to do as I please. Once that interest is had , it can be hard to stop and do what I need to do to settle down for the day and restart the next day. But over time I knew that I was doing the right thing and then motivation came in time.

While one of the common symptoms of bipolar disorder is being manic, there can be a point that it ends and then the crashes come, then the cycle repeats thus continuing to drain oneself to the point that the episode itself is more visible and the crash and burn happens to the point that the individual themselves is out of control and there is a very limited ability to have their faculties under control.

This has happened to me through two relapses in the past two summers and since I have been able to get myself under control, but it is in those initial stages that it can be difficult to find exactly what works for you and where you need to be in life. First of all, it is important to give yourself grace and be patient in the process of getting into the rhythm that you need to be in. The medications were a struggle that I knew that worked for a majority of my life but out of sheer ignorance and disregard from the time I started to live independently did not understand the severity to being steady with them until the two relapses happened and how necessary they were both needed to work in conjunction with my mental health treatment.

Even though for the longest time I could not see that, eventually I did and many times I have paid the price for missing out on so much in my life. The motivation does come back eventually and while it can be hard to imagine what that would look like, it does come back in its own way. It is also being aware of other things as it is in me like the anxiety that I also experience to work at fighting that as well as I have always known the necessity of that medication being beneficial for me, ultimately knowing that all medications are just as necessary as going to therapy or doing anything that needs to be done to assure proper mental well-being such as sleeping or applying certain coping strategies in the challenging times that I or anyone is experiencing.

There should never be any shame in doing what is necessary to be done to assure optimal mental well-being when it is necessary. For an exceptionally long time I could not see that. Eventually I did and while those initial days were a struggle to get back on back, eventually I realized that It was worth going through those initial days until that balance was met and knowing that it was essential that I never practiced the damaging decisions that I did in the past because that is not who I am and I can move forward with my life and good things can come out of taking care of my mental health in the process.