It can be hard when we come clean about something that is hurtful to us. It could be our fault or wrongdoing or not. But we must realize that we will never be free of the guilt that we carry by holding on to our secrets. Being autistic can make us feel that guilt more when things when we don’t or won’t come clean about what we are doing or experiencing that may not be wrong.

Being honest is indeed a quality for autistic people, but there is also a reality that that quality is not in everyone. Over the past six or so years that hid the fact as to whether I was adhering to my medication regimen. I eventually realized that I could no longer hold on to the deceptive behavior that I was doing. I would remember the moments that I would mask what I would really want to express from others because of not taking care of myself and I would not always be perfect at it. Eventually, the masking could no longer be helpful hiding the symptoms that I would experience, eventually making me realize that I was not doing myself any favors.

I also knew that the recovery process each time was difficult to go through and it was more challenging to stay on track, but in 2025 I made a vow to make my word of the year to be HONESTY. As much as it can be hurtful  to really tackle the issues head on, I did,  and I recovered from my struggles because I eventually realized that I needed to do the right thing because in the end I was not only hurting myself but also others as well.

It can be hard to admit what you did was wrong, but I knew that I had to take steps to prevent relapsing from happening again as challenging as it could be and never really seemed to work. So, I tried some of the skills that I was taught along with having the intuition that I needed to have to make things right, along with some what I believe was some divine intervention to make things work out for the better.

Now I do it because I have to. That is the hard truth. I had to understand the hard way over the past six or so years that I had to take care of my mental health and that includes adherence to my medication. No where can start where it is needed in your mental health journey without addressing the issues head on and as much as it can hurt to do so, in the end, you will feel better that you did and maybe sometimes hearing the frustration in others when you are for real honest about something that the frustration that those you work with experience when you are forever complacent makes you feel that you really need to work at doing what you need to do to stay well. It is retraining your brain so that you know the why and  how you need to take care of yourself so that you can be your best at those times when life is more stressful than others and you can cope with those challenges in the best way possible.

Being truthful can hurt, but in the end it is the best way to tackle your mental health challenges and work at making your life better. There is no health without mental health nor is their any shame in finding the help you need, but it doesn’t work unless you are honest. It may hurt to be honest, but your issues will never be solved unless you allow the truth to work its way through the hurt and be relieved in your brain.