For far too long. I have had many unpleasant habits for myself. They have interfered with my mental health to the point that it has been difficult for me to navigate the world around me. It has also put me in a very unhealthy and negative state that I know after many years of being in these negative habits that I need to repair.

The first step in all of this has been admitting that the habits that I have been practicing have indeed been unhealthy and the longer that I practice them, the harder they become to get back on track once I rectify the situation. I know that for the longest time I have struggled with my medication and sleep, and it has taken me some time to nurse myself back to where I need to be.

It has taken me a long time to understand the benefits of taking this seriously and that while there were things that I did that were unhealthy when I did not take it seriously, there has been a point when I am on borrowed time and that my mental health must become my priority. There are going to be some changes in 2024 that I must be mentally prepared for and that will mean that I need to be properly regulated and I will want to present myself in a proper manner that I have overcome the struggles of the past half decade and finally put these issues to rest.

Sometimes, it means that I must take more care of myself than I would like to. Meaning, that I must put to the side the things that I enjoy taking care of the things that are necessary for my mental health such as sleep. It can be hard to break old patterns, especially when those bad patterns bring a good feeling. But if they cannot be reeled in to the point that it can be brought to a healthy level, then the pattern will continue to be unhealthy for me and I will not be able to move on from them.

Replacing bad habits that have played out for far too long is something that is hard to do as an autistic person because we are so rigid and set in our ways that it can be hard to accept new things that may be hard for us to accept or make us feel infantized in nature because it feels like we have to do things that we do not prefer. But in my instance when I am doing them anyway, they are now able to be extended to the healthy amount of time so that my mental health is properly addressed and issues going forward are easier to manage, it pays off in the end.

In reality, it is realizing that I am on borrowed time, and it is ever more important to stop fooling around with my mental health and that there is a necessity to change my habits by replacing the bad ones with healthier ones that will need to be placed into continual practice and made a part of my life in front of the upcoming changes this year as time is running out to finally make things right and be there for others when I am needed.

I have so much to offer the world and my unrealistic reality that I can keep living in survivor mode is only setting me up to repeat the cycles of the past. It is time to understand and accept that I must continue to make myself and my mental health my priority. It is something that must be better understood in the coming days and months ahead of upcoming changes to make my life a successful one. You only get one chance in life to make things right, and that is something that I must get grounded in to function properly in a world that is often not in tune with being easy to navigate for me.