Many times, when I hear something that is unpleasant or is not something that I want to hear, don’t want, so forth. I may often immediately jump to conclusions thinking things that are not valid without considering all the reasons that something is the way that it is.

There can be many feelings on the emotional palate that instantly pass. Sometimes, it can be hard to develop an immediate response that is appropriate for the situation. Specifically, it can be one of the most known traits of being autistic where the reaction is blunt, either verbally or even physically. It is not a redeeming quality and for myself it has at times caused things to happen that I am certainly not proud of. 

It can send someone who is wired that way into a heightened sense of dysregulation and to some extent requires those that are knowledgeable in how to defuse challenging situations by not reacting to what is being exhibited at the very moment. By the continuous reactions and the back and forth, it will only make the situation more intense and longer to unwind from the elevated state. It should be noted that this is not something that just those that are able to speak, rather it affects all autistic people in their very own way. Regardless, there are moments of dysregulation and they can be brutal if not managed properly by all involved.

Oftentimes, the best solution is to seek a sense of safety from things that are triggering or may inflict further pain. Having time to de-escalate from challenging situations is a must if an ending to the event in question is ever to be sought. Being away for an autistic individual can at times feel like they are being abandoned or punished for something, regardless if they are indeed on the side of error or not. 

From experience, it can be hard for people to tell me that I need to walk away and take a break from something. At that moment the only thing that we want to do is get the result that we want and nothing can be seen other than seeking the gratification for what is desired. Some of the last words that someone who is persistent wants to hear is to ‘go away” or “be calm” and other terminology to make them think that they are indeed the problem.

While indeed it is the person acting out because they are dysregulated, in those moments there is a very short attention span. There is a very little thought process. It may be either a flight or fight or the need of seeking what is desired. At times it is persistent and as much as there is a desire for engagement, it must be done in the right and proper way that will not let the event to ensure or enrage further. 

Being knowledgeable in how each autistic individual operates and the ways to help them be able to recover easily and quickly when their thought palate becomes too full and by finding ways for them to be able to process what they need to in the way that they can is essential for succeeding through things that are challenging. Many may not understand, but getting to know the why and how of why it is they way it is and how to help is the best remedy in ensuring the best desired outcome when things become challenging

Please remember to keep the hope up. Despite the challenges, there are better days ahead.