For many, many years I had trouble being happy with my life. I thought that moving out on my own was the fix I needed. I believed it would improve the way I thought about things. Instead, I acted in the total opposite way. I did not care for my mental health. At times, I let my disorder overrule me. This did not end well. I had to learn what I had to do to stay well and find happiness in my own way.

After nearly six years of living on my own, I finally realized something crucial. Things like medication for my mental health challenges are essential. They are vital to my daily living. They help me thrive and be my best instead of surviving. I often pointed out the things that were wrong with my life. I focused on what was handed to me without seeing that some things were a blessing. When I realized there was so much to be grateful for, I saw it was not about finding something better. It was about making the best with what I had and seeing how good the things in my life were.

I had also seen that when I lived with my parents, I was happy. In those moments, I was not my best self. I thought that something was the worst thing in the world. I wanted to think my life was the worst. I wasn’t willing to see that we sometimes have to learn and grow from our mistakes. We must also learn that sometimes doors close on things that we have been used to for the best reasons. Over the past few years, I had to learn to live with new things. I gave them a chance to learn and grow in me. They have made life better for me. These experiences caused me to mature and grow in my own way.

There have been many times that I was not my best either. I was unwilling to see certain things. These things were not helping me be my best when I needed to have the best demeanor. This was crucial when navigating the outside world or when I faced challenging situations. I understand that if I want to make changes, I must accept what I have to do. Then, I need to work on those changes by improving them to be what they can be.

But what I know now is that I had to find my own happiness. I must be satisfied with who I am. I am grateful for what the world has provided me. It is not about complaining about what I don’t have. It is not about lamenting what once was. It’s also not about worrying about what is going to happen in the days ahead. It is about being current in the here and now. I must learn that choosing to be happy or satisfied with myself is my responsibility. If there is something that I do not like, then I must work to find what brings me compromise. I must seek calmness in the situation I am facing. It is about letting go of what I can’t control. I must also release what no longer serves me. This involves being mindful of what helps me stay well and happy with life as it is. It is the foundation that keeps me out of the doldrums when I am down and out. If it is to be, then it is up to me. I must find that happy place. For now, it is there!