Throughout my life, large gatherings in small spaces have been a challenge. As most of the world is having a holiday celebration, I find these gatherings more difficult. Over time they got better. Then COVID came, family grew and life circumstances have changed. Nonetheless, I have had to learn from past experience and adapt. This is something that I still do each year.

In the early years of my life many family celebrations were centered around my grandparents home. They loved and care for me so greatly for nearly three decades when my parents or my siblings could not. Things were comfortable. Even though there were more people, I felt relaxed. They accepted me for who I was. They also embraced the size of my grandparents’ house. In those early years on Christmas Day, we would visit the homes of my mom’s family. We would visit my dad’s family the day before. Later on, we split the houses in my mother’s family. My dad’s parents had divorced, making things complicated. So, we started one big Christmas Eve Gathering. On Christmas Day, my mom’s family had the big gathering. We would go to see my paternal grandmother before making visits to my mom’s uncles’ families the days after.

The world was different back then. Transitions became easier due to the extended time off school. This break made it easier to do what was both wanted and needed. It also facilitated going back to school with ease. As I left High School, that time became less. After vocational training, families had changed. I had matured to do what I withstand. I lived independently despite unwell behavior. I managed myself through the holidays without incident. Still, there was a time when I couldn’t find something I had misplaced. I needed it for something I wanted to work. I had become angry as I had done in the past. Eventually, I learned to make sure I had everything I needed before moving from place to place.

In the last few years, the pandemic created a significant barrier to how we celebrate the holidays. I learned to adapt with ease. As some of my father’s family grew, it became necessary to stay home during those visits. This was due to the crowded space and noise sensitivity. My sister has done the same for many years, and I too know that is just fine. Last year was totally different because of my father’s injury that summer. I had to learn to adapt in different ways. I also learned how to celebrate Christmas with my sister and her family. We had done this with my parents in the past. Visiting the Veterans Home was also part of that mix. My father is home this year so the celebration is still in place but is again different.

Through all these changes over the years, I have remained flexible. I adapt to whatever situation I face. Of course, that includes making time for transitions. Prioritizing self-care can help manage things in the best way possible. Over time I have had to learn to adapt to things and this is no different. But overall, I know this has to be a joyous situation. Maturity is crucial to ensuring that things go as well as they can be.