I am an autistic person who is quite the go-getter. It can be hard to admit that I need to have certain things in place to help me. It can be hard to accept the fact that I struggle with doing things in a way that others do. Sometimes I have to fight for the extra help that I need. Accepting this help can seem like I don’t deserve it or that I am weak. In the end, I am proud that the help is there. I needed to accept it.

Oftentimes as autistic adults we are taught to not be weak. But sometimes the things that we are being set to do can’t always be in our best interest. It can be hard to see that what is expected of us is actually more of a struggle. It is more difficult than we lead ourselves to believe. It can be hard to accept that we need help. It can be just as hard to advocate for what we need.

I am grateful that I have been capable of getting the things that I need. Still, I am not always proud of the fact that I need them. I feel ashamed that I can’t do things in the ways I want. I wish to believe that I can. But it takes others to see that I would struggle with doing something that is being expected of me. They also intervene with the ‘mama bear’ defense. They fight for what I need when they feel that I am being taken advantage of.

It takes seeing things not as a sign of weakness. Instead, it’s a sign of strength that I can do the same. I just need a little help in doing so. There should be no shame in that. I often see that I am not deserving of the extra help that is available. Sometimes, I want to resist asking for help. I even hesitate to ask for it, but when I do, it brings such relief to my mind. I realize that things are going to be okay.

Some supports are a guaranteed right. Even if it is, I see because of my perceived ability that I am not deserving of these supports. I can be hesitant to ask for help even though I know that things would be better for me. There can be the expectation of having to do things just like everyone else. Nevertheless, realizing that doing so is not always the best idea can be important. I have had to accept that needing extra help is okay.

If you are entitled to something and it helps you, then go for it. Never have shame in getting the support you need. Sometimes you don’t see that things are harder for you than you see. You are not aware of it. You have to be willing to accept that it’s OK to get the help you deserve. It’s there for a reason and there is no shame for having it.