One common stereotype of autistic individuals, particularly of those that require less support is that we lack the ability to show empathy at times when social norms dictate it to be shown. While indeed that may be a characteristic of being autistic, the fact that we do are indeed unemphatic is totally false. It is the way that we choose to show the empathy that we give to those that we love and care for.

It is a proven fact that most of the people that have died in my life, I have shown no emotion towards their passing. Although there was a particular colleague that died suddenly last year that struck me hard because we worked so deeply and many mutual feelings towards one another and eventually I had learned that she was proud of me beyond belief for all the obstacles that I have climbed as an autistic man to get to where I am today.

Nonetheless, as autistic individuals we show our empathy and love in many other ways that go beyond what we expected to be shown by the world. This past week has been one of the most empathetic weeks that I can remember in some time. Last weekend, my father experienced a severe stroke and was rushed by ambulance to a level one trauma center in a city that my mother was unfamiliar with. When she called me, asking for help, I immediately dropped everything and went to meet her and guide her to where we needed to be. Even as the GPS was guiding us to the wrong place and we were surmounted with many people calling trying to get my father the help that he needed, I continued to get us to where we needed to be.

I continued this practice for the entire past week, guiding my mother each time. Thankfully my father is now in a facility much closer to home that my mother can get to on her own, but the fact that I hung in there throughout last week being quite flexible from my routine, aiding her in advocating for my father’s care and being optimistic for both her and everyone else that needed it showing the care and compassion that was needed throughout the past week is an understatement that I can indeed provide empathy when it is needed to be provided, I just show it in other ways.

Regardless of what is said in the outside world about the inability of autistic individuals to show empathy is completely false because I have know and seen many time of not only myself but many other autistic individuals showing their empathy, love, caring and compassion towards those that they love and care for in ways that goes beyond the expected societal norm. So, when there are not the expected empathetic emotions given when its due, just know that deep down, as autistic individuals, we care about what is going on, we just show how we feel and care in other ways that are not expressed in the ways that society expects us to express ourselves. Be kind to us and do not pass judgment when the times are tough, and we are expected to express ourselves in the way that the world wants us to.