Even if I am in a continued state of progress, it is at times to realize that I am in that state of making strides towards bettering myself. Even if my brain thinks things to the contrary, there is plenty of proof otherwise that outweighs the contrary.

It is not like the proof is not in my own mind. I am getting compliments by those that know me. I choose to take my time with things and realize that the old adage of eating everything of a meal is a necessity just because it is there. It is also the realization that if I am not appetized by something, I do not have to force myself to eat it if I do not want to. Despite being flooded over the decades about food waste, I realize that there is no use in being miserable for feeling awful about having to consume food that I do not want.

I am not ignoring the fact that there is a huge food insecurity problem. In fact, I am well aware that there is and when I have food that is able to be donated that I know I will not eat, I make sure it gets in the hands of those that need it. I also do my due diligence by making others aware in the ways that I can about where they can seek food and other items should they need it. 

Despite the common stereotype about autistic people, we do have caring hearts and indeed I do this by combining both my caring heart and my interest and skills by making sure that I do what I can to help others do the simple things like find the things that they need, It makes no sense to not have things that you do not need by hoarding them. I know from past experience that I have a hoarding tendency and due to a very traumatic and challenging situation, I had to establish my fact that there has to be a limit in this regard. 

Likewise, I know that I cannot act in the same manner towards the fact of hiding the fact that I am doing just what I need to do in order to be well, both mentally and physically. Indeed, it can be challenging at times  and I also cannot deny that. But I now know what I need to do and that is why things are continuing to make their way on the better trajectory. I also accept reality. That I cannot control or make things happen the way that I want them to be. Yes, there are setbacks, but I have been struck too many times with seeing the potential reality if I did not get what I needed to get under control and make things right.

Obviously, that has been the right course of action. Things that happened because I wasn’t doing my best years ago are no longer needed because I took a stance, headed in the right direction, gave it a chance and allowed things to play out, and that they did for the better. Experiencing some of the things that were put into place four years ago now no longer needed and even things that have been in place for many years being decreased has proven not only by my own recognizance but by those that treat and care for me that indeed I am on the right track . That is where I plan on going and never reverting back to those old ways. 

There is so much more to see in this world and room for so much more improvement that I know that I need to continue on the current path in order to mature more in life, little by little, day by day and sometimes hour by hour. The one thing indeed I know is the fact that there is no turning back to those old ways that caused much strife in my life.