Sometimes, it can be hard to be motivated just as I am writing this blog post. But there comes a time that I have to just find the courage and fight the inner demons within myself and do what is necessary even if my body and brain is telling me differently.

Over a week ago, I was in quite the slump. I couldn’t find the motivation to do anything. I would spend a majority of time in bed, just laying around sleeping or browsing on my phone looking at senseless stuff. If I would get up other than go to the bathroom, it would be to watch something like the news or something at the time that wasn’t too long in duration. I just many times lacked the motivation to do anything.

I wasn’t like I was short on things to do. There is always plenty to do, but I could not just not muster the energy to do them. I go through phases like that where it lasts for a day or two before I get motivated to do things once again. There are times by brain loops and overrthinks about the things that I cannot control. It wants to find the solutions to things that cannot be solved although I think that I somehow have the power to convince someone to make things the way that I want them to be, even though I know that it can not always happen the way I want it to.

My brain emulsifies on these sometimes irrational and invalid facts that I obsess on them and end up falling into a sleep and when I get up from that deep sleep sometimes a few hours later, I start browsing at the senseless stuff on the phone, thus getting further distracted and unmotivated from what really needs to be done. I become the procrastinator of procrastinators and as such it can be a struggle to get through the day.

It is not any fault, it is just sometimes how my brain operates because it gets stuck on something that I think that is going to overtake the world as I know it or the fact that I need to get into a state of flight anxiety and run away from it because there is no other option that the one solution on the table that I think will work. My brain cannot see any other way out of it and the thoughts can sometimes be quite dark and uncanny to be quite honest. I know that mustering through them is the best action at the moment and that at last I need to reach out to someone If I don;t think that I can get back on track.

There were moments that past weekend that I seriously thought that I wasn’t going to get back on track but somehow I miraculously got through it one way or another without seeking help. I probably should have done that, but I man up and get through it as I often do because reaching out sometimes seems like you are being a “crutch” in some sort of way.  I get through many struggles in life without even recognizing how challenging they can be sometimes just because in my mind I think that they are miniscule in nature and may seem silly to others.

Nonetheless, sometimes my life has struggles, but the main thing is that I never give up fighting the fight of getting through the negative and dark thoughts and not fall into the latter. It can be a challenge in life but I know that life is always worth living,