Over the past few weeks as of this writing, I have been in a state of being more well. This has only resulted in me coming to terms with many things that aid me in the process of being and staying well so I can live independently and function in society.

While ultimately the common denominator is the adherence to my medication over the course of nearly the past month or so, in coming to terms with that was the facts that there’s things that I had to come to terms with in addition the medication that finally made me accept the necessity of having overall mental wellness and strive towards physical wellness.

Foremost, it has been accepting the fact that I had to learn about the medication that I have been struggling with and what I believed that it was not doing was in fact not totally the case. While it does help my autistic tendencies to a point, it is that all humans need their sleep and that I am no exception to this rule. The medication helps shut my brain down and prevents me from being hyper focused on things that I do not need to be that can become unhealthy for me.

Having accepted that, was the beginning to start to rethink my desires as a human body and really align my identities to where they need to be in order to be healthy. It was learning more attraction than desire and limiting obsession on the attraction and the fact that I do not want other elements of a relationship helped me reguide my overall additional identities to where they are. This has provided me closure and the willingness to move on from not only what I knew I did not want but also what others knew I would not enjoy. Accepting such gives me closure in this realm,

While that was one of the biggest things that I had to accept in terms of understanding the need to be well, it was also understand that I needs extra special care just because I am autistic and it and my other challenges is a lot to bear. This means accepting autistic fatigue, burnout and the understanding that with imbalance of my sensory palate that there may be a need to have my routine further uprooted by needing to decompress by napping or having sensory breaks and that among with the other necessary needs is acceptable and it has to start with me and not giving a care about it because I need to take care of me first and foremost.

Furthermore, it is accepting the fact that I need to better manage my task load and understanding that things can wait and it is needed to take care of myself first and foremost. It has been nearly five years and it has come to the point that I had to accept things for what they are. It has been a long road and now being in a better place for some time mentally has made me see that there is opportunity if I allow it into my life and in order to have those opportunities means that I have to take care of myself so I can participate in them.

As I have said, this is going to be the summer to shine and as we are now on the eve of the official start to summer, I am beginning to accept the fact that I can have and enjoy the things that I want in life, however they must be in perfect balance so I can be well and maintain my independence and job and not have any regression as commonly happens in adults. Accepting the necessities of what I need to do with my life and move on is another way that my life is going to be so much better and enjoy what I find pleasurable in life.