Without a doubt, one of the most challenging aspects of autism is managing uncertainty. Another difficult aspect is coping with the possibility of change happening in our lives. It can be difficult when things don’t happen like they should or that something abruptly changes in our lives. But the reality is that our world is always in a state of constant change and uncertainty. For over two decades, I have been working at being flexible. While I have nearly mastered the ability, it is still something that sometimes can be a challenge.

The reality of life is that we can never avoid change and uncertainty. As much as we don’t like to think it, things get misinterpreted and other humans can make mistakes. Often, we want to be defensive. We point the blame at someone. We think they made a mistake or are at fault. We believe something did not go the way it should. Still, this is often not the best course of action. That is because we often get entangled in our emotions. By being passionate, we let ourselves react in ways that are not always appropriate.

Uncertainty can elevate our nervous system. It often reacts strongly. For me, it often wants to avoid things. My nervous system tells me that the bad things are going to happen again. It feels like it will be even worse. In reality, there is great uncertainty about it happening again. But, my brain wants to develop a strategy to let go of the energy I feel. It can make me want to take out my anger at others. I do this to feel like I am getting what I want. In fact, it often only makes things worse. It lets others know of the person that I do not want to be.

I find it hard to keep my composure when I get anxious about uncertainties or changes. Yet, I have begun to learn that it is best to do my best to keep my composure. This helps me avoid reacting in a way that damages the respect of those who admire me. It also prevents detrimental consequences. It takes time to learn how to cope effectively when someone or something makes us more stressed. Often, we just want to react in an unhealthy or inappropriate way.

It is learning that there is so much more to life. We should not let uncontrollable things or what our brain exaggerates become a big part of our day. It takes learning how to distract ourselves. We should see the other good things in my life. We must avoid letting ourselves be bogged down by things that irritate us. These things cause us to be anxious. They not happen the way we expected. They also cause us to be in fear. It takes learning to embrace changes and uncertainty as they occur. It also involves learning to make the best of the situation that you are dealt.