Until late last year, I harbored the past for a very long time. I held on to the hard feelings about the way that things were in certain situations. It was hard to let go. This led to excessive ruminations and obsession. At times, delayed echolalia became hard to bear. Eventually through a unusual process I had to learn to let go of what I was feeling for good.

Over the past few years, there have been many changes. Initially, these changes were hard to accept. This was because of beliefs rooted in the past and an unwillingness to give things a chance to work out. It was hard to let go of the old feelings. These feelings were long harbored because of the past. The way things were made me believe they ended up being the way they are today. It was difficult to see initially. Yet, things actually became better. I saw the real situation of things instead of believing what I had long thought. I had to learn that I would never be at peace. This would only happen if I learned to let go of what was. I also needed to be willing to move on with the way things are.

At first, it was hard to accept what was happening. I had to be willing to see that things were getting better. This was achieved by not embracing hate and toxicity as I did in the past. I learned that I had to play a part in working on myself. I focused on how I handled social situations. I learned how to live life in my own way. I had to learn to shift the focus away from what I had long been ruminating or obsessed about. I realized I had a life to discover within myself. It had more potential than I would ever dare to dream.

Often what I had held on to in the past held me down like I was a prisoner. It controlled many things and even made me project misery in the company of others. I held on to so much of what was and a lot of what wasn’t even valid anymore. I didn’t realize that the power to lead my life as I saw fit was in my destiny. I started letting go of what I had long believed to be a problem. In reality, it wasn’t a problem at all.

Once I began to let go of the things that held me back, I allowed myself to live more. It became clear to me that there was so much more to see in my life. There was more than what I had let onto being hateful and unpleasant. I had to learn to let go of things. These things no longer had the capacity to hold me back. Those feelings did. I had to see that things were not the way that I had always seen them. I realized that I too had the power to control how things can be for me. By learning to let go of things that greatly held me back, I saw there was much to discover. These discoveries were ahead of the rest of my world.