Over the seven of the past eight years, I battled the necessity of all of my mental health medications. While working to get more grounded, I realized something important. Many experiences of others showed me that not taking mental health medications creates a pointless path. This path is also destructive. I was on that path many times. I was grateful. It did not lead to some pretty extenuating circumstances. I know those would be unpleasant and unwanted.

I experienced many battles. Through them, I realized that conversations about my fear and safety happened because I was not taking my medication correctly. I let fears and baseless theories drive me. I believed I did not have the capacity to take it if doses were missed. I disregarded the necessity of the medication for lengthy periods. I couldn’t see the danger I kept putting myself in when others saw the signs.

I saw many examples and experiences. They showed how things happened without consistent medication. This realization made me understand the importance of working my hardest to get back on track. I recognized the value it brings to myself and those around me. It is essential for my existence in this world. Over the past year, others began to notice my improvement. Their recognition gave me the drive and determination I needed to keep going. They saw the change I needed to see instead of me fighting the same fight and barely surviving.

Without a doubt, it can be hard. It takes patience for things to settle within yourself. You will see that things often do get better with the right cocktail of medication. I am living proof of that. Now I know it is what it takes for me to exist in this world. It is knowing that not taking it is what causes concern and fear in others around me. All it can take is one thing to set me off in an unwanted direction and cause further concern. That one thing can be what leads to a very consequential outcome. This outcome be unwanted and hard to rebuild from.

What I had found was that the battle of whether or not to take my medication was in my mind. By seeing the benefits that it provided, along with the good compliments that it brought, I found motivation. It kept me going and doing what was needed. This ensured that it and other things happened, so I lived my best life. I saw what happens in reality if medication is not taken. I also saw its portrayal on screen. This showed why it was important. It also highlighted why keeping everything in balance was just as crucial.

I had to let go of all the baseless theories I had believed. I realized that things were only possible the way they were, even though they made me feel bad. I saw that what I was doing was pointless and destructive, not only to myself but to others. It was crucial to see that the medication mattered, no matter what, to stay in line with it.