For years, I had felt the need to seek attention to feel wanted. I was unwilling to see that by doing the right work, I created my own path. This path did not need me to become more than I wanted to be. I did not need to be just wanted, liked, or seen as the one who had to feel good.

When I look at my core priorities, I see what is most important to me. I also see what those who want to follow me will seek. I had led myself to believe that I needed to have connections with anyone I felt would accept me. I did this without considering whether these connections were beneficial to my wellbeing. Connecting with someone for the wrong reasons can lead you down an unwanted spiral. It took me a long time to realize that someone was toxic for me because of their unwanted needs. I had to understand that having a friendship had to have set boundaries and respect for each other.

I couldn’t see that I had to be patient. I also needed to be well. Then I realize that the right people would like and befriend me for the right reasons. Each person you connect with not meet every expectation. Nonetheless, you can support them in the way you are able. I had to become grounded and take care of myself before I extended myself to others. Sometimes that connection came in the right way and for the right reasons. Other times we lived similar walks. We shared some of the feelings in those walks. Some were just there to make the connection we needed to make.

My life was going great. I realized that there was a reason to be my best. Those who looked up to me saw my accomplishments and qualities. They found inspiration to better themselves in the ways they needed to. I constantly reminded myself to be the better person. I needed to take the high road. This involved caring for myself in the ways my peers expected me to. I have had moments when I did not care for myself properly. My peers, who thought so much of me, saw my uncontrolled fury. It perplexed them. It showed me in a light that I was not the proudest to be in. This gave me the drive to do better.

The road to where I am today has not been perfect. I did a lot of learning, growing, and understanding. I realized that I can be who I need to be without seeking the attention of others. I don’t need to feel wanted and validated for the things I do. I had a great tribe. Those that connected to me did as they wished. Others chose their level of connection, which I obliged to. I realized that people would like me for the right reasons and not the fake ones.