For half of the past weekend, my anxiety was in overdrive, kicking into flight mode because I want to run from reality. It also hurts when you realize how someone really was that you thought was there for you, but in the same turn they did quite the opposite. That’s what making connections as an … Continue reading Weekly Reset
Last week, as part of many of my mental health services, I had to undergo my assessment as part of re-establishing goals for the services I receive. In one assessment, one of the questions that frequently appeared was what was identified as ‘natural supports’. Until some years ago, I lacked this in many ways. In fact, it takes courage sometimes as an autistic person to seek out someone to be a natural support and be able to maintain that contact.
Over the past weeks when being out and about, I have had to learn that regardless what someone ha cause me or what I personally feel about them, I musnt treat them differently because of that, I have to remember that they are just a person as much as I am and it doesn’t cost anything for me to be nice to them.
As I continue down the journey of my personal self-discovery. One of the things that has helped me refrain myself from the process is the ability to make connections with others with similar challenges so the world that I was living in didn’t seem so small although it was physically, it made me be more of a friend that I ever have been.
Vlogs from the past week.
In last week’s adulting blog, I discussed being independent and having the ability to make your own choices and own them without feeling invalid. This week, while accepting more boundaries for myself made me understand that I, along with anyone else autistic or neurotypical, have rights for themselves. One of the struggles that I see in many autistics, including myself, is that of consent.
Change in autistics is a known challenge, I oftentimes mask what I am feeling and then vent it out to someone that I consider it my safe person. But when someone who wants to be there for me says don’t be in a negative attitude and that they care so much that I can’t push them away because they show that they care.
Having friends outside of family in the past few years has taught me to set my own boundaries in what I share, how I respond to others, standing up for my personal needs and values along with respecting myself.
Yesterday, I had an epiphany. While I WANT to adult, I HAVE to put forth the effort to want and need the changes and the responsibilities of being an adult. For the majority of my adulthood, I have shied away from issues in life because they may require me to put my “big boy pants” on and fight them. Oftentimes, for me, anxiety is a big player in the game of adulting that really isn’t a game, because I just revert back to my immature self and refuse to deal with the issues at hand, because I personally know they are going to be unpleasant and scary for me to tackle.